that I "signed my life away", enlisting in the Navy. 17, 2 months from graduation and absolutely sure that no matter what else I did, staying here was not an option!
Probably a good thing; my Dad had already made me refuse a full-ride music scholarship and getting us as far away from each other as possible for a while was the best thing that could have happened...
Looking back over the years, even with all that's going on now, I wouldn't change a thing!
Every now and then I look for a ball cap with my old squadron insignia on it and a few weeks ago ran across this:
That was one of the aircraft I worked on; flew in sometimes, and was even lucky enough to get a bit of "stick time" in. Those are my WestPac cruise dates as well. Of course, when I tried to buy the print, it is no longer available, but I'll consider myself lucky to have found just the jpeg!
I was released from the hospital late on Wednesday night and have spent most of the last 3 days being very lazy; sleeping late, reading and watching a bit of TV. I fixed dinner each night, but that's about all I've done that was "extra". They said the "sotolol" they put me on to control my heart would make me feel tired until my body adjusted to it, and said it would be a week or so. I'm willing to take their word for it. I can tell about 30 minutes after I take it there is a "drowsy spell" before I feel like even moving again!
I did finish "Gondal's Queen" while I was in, began reading Vita Sackville-West's "Selected Essays" but when I got home I couldn't resist picking up Irene Nemirovsky's "The Wine of Solitude". I'm finding myself looking for every excuse to slip away with it. Sadly, it doesn't appear to have been read by anyone despite 2 years on the shelf at a major university.
I have chemo again this next Thursday, so if I don't blog before that I'll try and get by after just to say "Hi" and let you know I'm still around.
May the week be kind to each of you!
alan
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3 comments:
Hi Alan - I love reading about the memories. I bet some of it feels just like yesterday.
I too recognise that need to escape which then justifies or makes whatever it is more acceptable - even losing out on the music career.
Good luck with the chemo and enjoy the books. Doris x
Glad to know you are home and on the way to more energy and a regular heartbeat. It's great that you have enough free attention to delight in reading good books. There's so much enrichment in well-written literature. Enjoy every minute of it, and best wishes for an easy round of chemo.
Hi Alan. I remember reading your post years ago about the denied music scholarship and feeling so blessed to have been allowed to attend art school. The sick, dark kid in my head says, "well, you were a girl. he wouldn't have let you if you were a boy." One gift you have given me repeatedly, and reminded me of today, is valuing the moment and everything that brought us to it keeps the regrets away!
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