kind of sums things up around here!
They still haven't scheduled the P.E.T. scan because they're trying to give the chemo some time to max its result. I cancelled the pulmonologist appointment accordingly, though I'm beginning to regret it a bit. I'm on my 3rd round of antibiotic, having changed drugs for this 3rd round and finally between it and Mucinex it seems perhaps, grudglingly, the bug is giving up.
I've been keeping better track of my O2 numbers this past week as well and would almost bet money they've slipped a bit again. I drop just wandering around the house now with the concentrator set on numbers that used to let me walk at a fast pace on the treadmill. If I don't concentrate on my breathing I drop to a point that is scary low-down in the 70's. I'm using a shower chair now because that's the time I drop the worst, even with the concentrator maxed out.
So I'm starting to think in months now, rather than years...
Despite Kansas City falling into the "deep freeze" of late, things are coming together nicely for the holidays! A good thing, as I'm not up to shopping like I used to. The box to Vermont is gone and a lot of the shopping for here is done now; we're still waiting on lists from a few hold-outs to finish things. We haven't gotten our tree yet, but will in the next few days. I'm also hoping to get a new glasses prescription as I haven't had new ones in 6 years and my reading is starting to suffer from that along with some badly placed scratches on my old ones.
What I've been lacking there I've been making up watching TV as I've had to spend a lot of time on the couch this past week due to some swelling in my left lower leg (jokes of tapping it didn't make Dottie laugh at all). A few weeks ago I picked a Roku box (internet television running off my wireless router) and between the free outlets available and the others I've spent a lot of hours watching things from it. Now that the Chiefs game is over and I can take my eyes away to fix some lunch, I'll be moving there in just a bit to either watch Dawn French or Chaplin-I haven't quite made my mind up yet. I've also spent some time watching the NASA channel (free) and actually got to see them discussing the delivery vehicle for one of Bill's projects!
Thank you all for the kind words and encouragement each time you come here. I know it isn't easy when I don't sugarcoat what's going on but life is a bit too short for that anymore!
I hope the holidays find each of you somewhere wonderful with those you want gathered near!
May the world be kind to each of you!
alan
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3 comments:
I wish things were going better and easier for you, alan. Maybe there will be some good and encouraging news when you have the PET scan. We're sending all the best to you and yours for the holidays AND every day, as well.
Thank you for keeping the blog updated. Please take care, alan.
Ahhh Alan, how brave of you to write that you are thinking in terms of months rather than years. This place is for you to write how you feel and not to sugar coat for anyone else. My heart goes out to you because it is just not fair. Simple as that.
Do you realise that earlier this year my friend passed and I physically went through the last few months with her. She was told end of Jan and she made it to end of Feb, not long after her 60th. She had the whole thing with O2 levels as well. Although it all did not seem real at the time, she talked about it being the end and made plans and sorted some things out before hand. Her only son was just 19.
I think that is an incredibly hard thing to do as we just do not accept death these days and fight so hard against it when it is supposed to be part of the natural cycle. On the one hand we are given drugs that might make a difference and could do so, working towards extending our lives, and then at what point do we have to mentally switch from life changing to palliative care?
Enjoy your Christmas tree when you get it - I can imagine it smelling of pine. As for your set top box, we recently had to renew ours as the old one gave up the ghost and our new one is a proper freeview (rather than the downgraded from paid for service) and now we can watch Youtube on the TV with it. This Saturday I spent the day on the sofa flicking around youtube on the bigger screen which squandered the day but was fun.
I'll say it again Alan, you have been a sweetheart on the blogs over the years and have shown so much compassion and kindness to all sorts of people which I will never forget.
May your day be happy and light. :-)
Alan,
I've read your blog for years and rarely put up a comment. I want to say now, in case I don't get a chance to later, what a privilege it's been to read about your life.
I hope you have an excellent Christmas and a great New Year. xx
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